


Ben & Jer-Bears

by pretive



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Cuddling, Cutesy, Fluff, Hot, Ice Cream, M/M, Phan - Freeform, Phandom - Freeform, Phanfiction, Summer, accidental crotch hig, ben and jerries ice cream, i love cherry garcia, phanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2019-01-16 17:51:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12347601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pretive/pseuds/pretive
Summary: It’s hot, they’re exhausted, and Dan and Phil are maybe a little bit off their rocker. Accidental crotch shots and giggles ensue.





	Ben & Jer-Bears

Summertime in England was excruciating. The weather is in the nineties early June, and Phil is beginning to think that Dan’s got a second round of heat-stroke even though the boy hasn’t even gone outside once in the past few days. 

Dan was warmth during the winter, and pure fire during the summer. He often got miserably hot during the day which means long, uncomfortable nights awaited him. Phil isn’t a human ice pack whatsoever, but he is cold blooded and enjoys the heat whilst Dan still sprawled out over him, no matter how disgustingly sweaty it makes the two.

Today it’s lower, in the high seventies, but Dan’s hair is stuck to his forehead and the sweaty brown locks dance around his head in ringlets. Beads of sweat adhere to the skin of his temples, and his eyes are closed and his mouth hangs open slightly. Phil becomes tempted to reach out to wipe the sweat away and pull him closer, but honestly, he is slightly annoyed. 

Dan, however adorable in Phil’s white shirt and black boxers, black ankle socks adorning his feet, was suffocating Phil in heat. Phil had been minding his own business, watching Buffy in the lounge and enjoying the little relief their tiny fan brought to his body, clad in nothing but boxers and a pair of mismatched socks, when Dan came in groaning.

“It’s so bloody hot, Phil.” Dan mumbles into Phil’s chest, hot breath making Phil squirm slightly as he wraps his arms comfortingly around Dan’s torso, trying to be a good boyfriend even whilst he felt like pushing Dan into the fireplace. “You’re so cool.” Phil fights back a snicker at that one. 

Dan had fallen asleep for an hour, his dead weight only gathering more and more sweat between their chests as Dan snored softly. Dan awoke again, and Phil tries to gently scoot Dan to spoon from a bit of a distance. That’s when Dan jumped up.

This sudden action makes Phil gasp for three reasons;  
-It was a slight surprise, Dan was barely awake and no one should move that fast when they’re half awake unless they’re some weird creature from a Stephen King novel  
-He’d nearly been thrown off the couch in the process as his arms had been wrapped around Dan’s waist  
-Dan had firmly elbowed him straight in the crotch

Phil doubled over in pain, palms cupping the tender area and hissing while he let his head dangle between his legs. Phil’s eyes are watering, all heat forgotten, and he feels sick. What the hell was Dan doing?

That question is answered when Dan returns with two full tubs of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, one Rocky Road and the other Cherry Garcia. Dan’s grin is smug and satisfied, but as soon as he sees Phil hunched over in pain, his smugness cracks. 

“Oh my god, did, did I hit you in the-!” Dan bends over laughing, setting the tubs down on the floor. Phil glares at him without malice. Dan’s nearly choking at this point, and Phil is starting to lose the feeling of his intestines being knotted and ripped. “Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Dan wipes tears from his eyes as he stands up and gives Phil the tub of Cherry Garcia, laying back on top of Phil after Phil has a hold of it. Phil huffs, but the heat isn’t that unbearable with ice cream.

Dan shoves another spoonful of Rocky Road into his mouth as Phil starts flipping through channels on the remote. The news iss on, mostly just angry and sweaty Brits droning on about the weather, or the occasional crime story. There aren’t many channels they pay for considering they use their internet accounts to stream most of the time.

Phil is blindly clicking at this point, but he’s snapped out of his haze by a squeal and frantic pointing with the end of a spoon, and Phil sees a familiar yellow bear with a red shirt, hand stuck down into a jar of honey. 

Phil sets the remote down and it’s not long before he’s distracted again, this time by Dan. Dan’s got the spoon pulling his lip down and little drips of white ice cream dripping past his lip, and he looks beautiful. Dan is undoubtedly haphazard, something endearing and lovely about him. There were often things strewn about in the office, his hair left to curl on itself as Dan became more comfortable with himself, but nothing was more beautiful when Dan was focused on something.

When Dan was relaxed, it was usually right before sleep. Of course, Dan was always gorgeous in that aspect too, but when he begins to mouth the words to whatever show he’s watching, book he’s reading, or thing he’s typing, his lips look far more appealing. 

Dan’s lips go from pout to a quick twitch, and it does that a few more times before Dan is biting back a smile. Phil looks at the telly, and it’s not exactly a happy moment, just one where Eeyore is saying something a bit sad, and this is where Dan usually nods and says, ‘same’. Instead, he’s beginning to giggle to himself.

Suddenly, Dan’s doubled over in laughter, and Phil is concerned. Had this been a part of the heat stroke side affects he’d read over? Hysteria wasn’t one of the side affects, at least Phil doesn’t think so. Phil loves Dan, he really does, but sometimes Dan can be slightly psychotic. 

Dan’s still got ice cream on his lips, and he looks manic with laughter, his eyes watering, setting his ice cream down on the floor to avoid spilling it. Dan looks up for a moment at Phil, almost expecting him to be laughing along, and instead is greeted by a concerned look. It only spurs him on. 

“Ph-Phil, you, you have to listen to this. Okay okay, -” He can’t keep his laughter at bay, and Phil starts to giggle at Dan’s amusement. “Phil, Phil, Phil, Phil, Phil, li-listen. Ben and, B-Ben and Jer-Bears.” Psychotic is definitely correct terminology.

Dan’s laughing so hard that Phil can’t help himself. They feed off each other, the heat and the sugar and the situation at hand making everything seem much more hilarious than it really is. Phil snorts a bit, only adding more to the hilarity.

Only five minutes later do they stop laughing, the sweltering heat mixed with the drop from their sugar highs making them tired. Phil, however hot and uncomfortable he may feel, pulls Dan into his chest. The tubs of ice cream are set aside on the floor, forgotten. They could always buy more. 

They fall asleep hot sweaty, but content, and a little more in love with each other.


End file.
